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Ah yes, the follow up to the Company's Own Field of Dreams.

The chairs down there, as I have mentioned, look very futuristic; mui unique.

Last night I had GCV (ie Ginormous Client Visit) complete with hot breakfast, catered lunch, and reservations at a restaurant whose prices share one thing with the Field of Dreams - they're exorbitantly expensive. This restaurant is located in the newly completed, fabricated community of quaintness out in West O known as Village Pointe.

Moving right along…the GCV was hosted by one of my all-time favorite directors. He is so down to earth. He also, apparently, has back problems. Well so do I and half the people who work here, so take a number. But I feel compassion for him; he is plainly not faking. That is not his style in the least. Not that I have any right at all to judge whether someone's faking anything or not. Their thoughts are their business, not mine.

We all have these incredibly ugly chairs up here in an otherwise tastefully decorated cubefarm. I know we definitely have it better than the cubefarmers down on 2. Their cubes are claustrophobic and aged, and I'm not sure who decided they should be gray with dark purple, but the effect is all in all very drab, dark, and reminiscent of a cave.

Our chairs are comfy enough but they, like most office chairs, are nothing to write home about.

Those futuristic chairs down in the Field of Dreams though? Those chairs that are a feat of seating engineering…well, those chairs are a different story. They have something in common with Louis XVI furniture in that they don't look very durable or comfortable. But when you sit in them, allllllll day, you discover quickly that they are in fact both.

We'll call this director The King.

The King also discovered this. His back was happy all day. And at the end of the day, while I was cleaning up the Field of Dreams Cavern and chit chatting with his  clients, he informed me that he would be liberating one of those chairs from its bondage in the FOD cavern and bringing it upstairs to his office. To that end, he asked me if I had seen our great leaders leave yet, which I had to confess that I had not. His eyes darkened in disappointment until I mentioned that those luminaries usually take the stairs that are right next to their offices. His eyes lit up and away he went. Who was I to stop him? "Halt! Stop right there with that chair!!!!!" Hey, Christmas is coming and I don't want to damage my chances of a good haul.

Now Facilities is pretty rabid about making sure they keep this area clean, maintained, and that all parts are accounted for, right down to the futuristic trashcans. I remember back when the FOD opened up originally and they were going nuts because a trashcan was missing. Horrors!

So when the King made off with his chair, it didn't go unnoticed. The pecky facilities guy was up here lickety split inquiring after who was in the FOD yesterday, who spearheaded that? Do I know where the missing chair went? I told him the answers to A and B, and "I don't know" to the last question.

So then he talks to Twiggy and goes in the King's office with her and is soon asking me, "Did he have that chair before?" "I don't know what kind of chair he had in there."

I emailed the King the news and told him he should probably return his new throne. Covertly. But that was before Twiggy and Facilites Guy had a get together in the poor guy's office. Now he cannot avoid the shame. Sorry, buddy, did all I could for you.

But hey, you can always go the same way that this guy did. http://asecretaryslife.blogspot.com/2006/02/venting-to-entirely-wrong-audience.html. Get a conference room chair, use it for a month, look utterly miserable, and hope Napoleon takes mercy on you. Voila! Super duper future chair!!!!

Meanwhile, suck it up buddy, cause you done sinned. And I hope I get a nice gift certificate outta you in April, cause I felt mighty uncomfortable lying to Facilities Guy.

Alrighty, off I go to filch a diet pop outta the client visit fridge that no one uses anymore except for filching pop. :)