The Crazy Sandbox

Darling Niki can attest that I'm pretty crazy. But I'm not nearly as crazy as I used to be.

 

For one thing, I don't play in the Crazy Sandbox as much as I used to.

 

Now, crazy looks crazy. So when Mr. Wrong doesn't show up here, and then I block most possible avenues of communication, neglecting one, but not on purpose, and he slips one through and sends me a crazy message, I can actually see that it's a crazy headgame that he's trying to play.

 

So I can respond to it, and then finish blocking him, and then let it be.

 

It used to be that I would continue to play with him in the crazy sandbox. I'd continue to play the headgames, and I'd let him mess with me, and obsess about it for hours and hours.

 

My sister's doing some crazy shit like that too. She told a lie about me to the workers on her case, then she emailed me today, and she told me and a bunch of other folks that she'd been cleared of the most recent abuse allegations. I just wrote her back and said, why are you speaking to me? you lied about me to those people.

 

And though I was itching to really tell her off, I held it in, and then stepped out of the Crazy Sandbox. I really shouldn't have stepped in at all, but you know going from crazy to sane is a process, people.

 

Oh and I did in fact cut my hair off yesterday. Pictures will be posted later, but they'll only be pictures of the large pile of my hair on the floor, since I don't want to show my face :) .

 

I'm nervous right now that I fucked up one of my director's expenses, because now he's got this little nasty gram about how his corporate Amex has been suspended. I'm like, ok what's up with that? I haven't had any receipts from him for a while and his Amex was clean as a whistle, as far as I could tell. So now I'm nervous, thinking that maybe I fucked up.

 

I like posting from home. This way I can cuss, no asterisks required. :o)