My Writing Used to Be So Much Funnier

OMG it was so much funnier. Like rapier-sharp funny. What is up with that? Where did my sense of humor go? Now this blog is all just whining. WTF?

Like, there was the post about 'A Food I Shall Endeavor to Never Eat Again', which I was thinking of today because I have A TON of gas. I think Twiggy is actually surreptitiously spraying air freshener in my cube. Every so often after I let one loose, I'll catch a whiff of something that smells like frickin roses.

See, the thing is that I used to not care about this stuff or I thought it was kinda funny. No longer, friend. I'm not sure what changed, but I am kinda concerned that I may be known in the department as a gas-bag or something. :o( That would suck. Combine that with being overweight, and you get the stereotypical gross fat person stereotype thingy. Ugh, I gotta get some Gas-X. This will actually dovetail nicely with my plan to finally get my flex spending account debit card back. It's not really going my way so far, which I shall post about soon.

Then there was the post about my cube being changed so people can see me. Do you realize that that happened in August 2006 and it was changed in November or October 2007 - over a year later? That post even had a drawing.

Aw God, I have gas again. Dangit! Where the heck is all this coming from? It can't be the lentils, can it? The pokoras? Maybe the stuff that one covers the pokoras with -- the chickpea flour. Yes, I did say chickpea flour - you can indeed grind up anything and call it flour, apparently. That lady who wrote about hiding the spinach in the cookies should have talked to a PAkistani or Indian person and she'd have learned quick that you can hide good stuff anywhere if you fry it in veggie oil and add salt. Well, broccoli probably wouldn't go over too well that way.

Anyway, why on God's green earth would a parent go through a complicated, super secret recipe in order to hide spinach in the cookies? Only wussy parent have to do that. The rest of us, who are not wussies, command our children to eat their veggies and those same children will starve to death before they get ice cream prior to eating their veggies. Again, I cite the child-worshipping society that we now find ourselves living in.