Exciting News!!!

Well kids, I have been mulling for a while what direction I should take in my education -- what will be attainable and what won't be, and navigating the waters of the unknown.

Vocal music would be unattainable. I would have to quit my full time job and that's not an option.

I don't like business degrees.

So I found this two year Liberal Arts transfer degree at our local community college, which is an awesome school. And I signed up for my first class, which is English Comp II. They snapped my picture for the student ID, I look pretty good. :)

So I'm now a college student. :o)

So Many SPECIAL People

You would not believe how many special people there are here at ABC Nuts and Bolts. First off, there are VPs around every frickin corner. Considering how many there are, if I were a VP, I would be fearing for my job. Or plotting the demise of the others. Take your pick.

And, apparently, every VP needs to have a parking space in the heated garage. Sales has about 13 of those. I support three of those ten folks. Yay for me!

And yet, even though I support three of those folks, I hardly ever get to park in the garage. I have to make sure I get here EARLY in order to make my claim lest someone else snag my spot!

And the 'special' epidemic isn't just at the corporate headquarters building. It's also at the crappy buildings. I was just over at the crappiest of them all yesterday. And I'm trying to find a place to park and sure enough, there was one visitor spot, 2 handicapped spots, and all the other good spots were RESERVED!  IE -- Vice President parking!!! God, how many can there be? Enough to populate a small town? People, a recession is coming, may have already hit -- and these folks will start finding out how 'special' they are when the Company starts deciding how they can prop up profits.

Just TRY arriving late and finding a decent parking spot in the morning here at the Corporate Headquarters. Try it more than once! You will soon find that if you judged this company's goodwill toward its employees by the number of available desireable parking spots, you would judge that goodwill to be non-existent. And now they're even leasing out their non-heated garage spaces to surrounding companies! Boy that sure was irritating one day when I was late and looking for parking. The non-heated garage was just about full!! FULL!!!

It's Finally Happened...

Did you read today that 4 paparazzi were arrested while chasing Britney Spears? They were arrested for reckless driving. I'm so glad the police have finally found a way to curb some of this. I hope more of them get arrested.  Yes, I read gossip blogs, but I don't want anyone getting hurt so a photographer can get a picture.

You, Sir, Are One Confused Skeeve

Once upon a time, I was dating people. Looking for Mr. Right. Well I went on a date with this Puerto Rican guy, he was a major in the air force. Severely smart, extremely educated. Let's name him the Mambo King before we go forward. That's what he was called when he was younger because boy can dance. He loves Latin dancing.

So the Mambo King was a DEVOUT Catholic. We went on a date and it was cool. He was trying to touch my hand and I thought that was ok. He wasn't the best looking fella in the world but not ugly either.

After that date, we didn't go out again although we talked a lot on Yahoo. I'm not sure what disqualified me from the running but I was definitely disqualified. He started dating some girl who had health problems. Ay mi! Did I spell that right?

She was just as Catholic and in love with Jesus and churching as he was. Match made in heaven right? Oh and she was educated too.

So the Mambo King and I talked a lot but not much came from it. It was like some kind of crazy dance. I moved on and dated around and had fun living my life.

One day, the Mambo King let me know that he had proposed to wife #2.

What happened to wife #1, you say? Well, the Mambo King had married her, become dissatisfied with the marriage, and visited someone he knew online. Now he didn't sleep with the visitee, but his wife wasn't happy about it. At all. And felt she couldn't trust him any longer. Yes, this does have a bearing on the story.

So Mambo King gets engaged. But wife #2 ain't putting out. Supposedly, he's cool with that. Yeah right. Suddenly, he's wanting to have steamy conversation. They weren't married yet, and he was expressing doubt about things, so I didn't really care. Keep in mind that I was a different person back then. Plus I was crushing on him. I know that excuses nothing. Moving on....

So one night, he invites me over. And guess what happens? Well, almost happens. Because he sort of broke down crying in the middle. Because he is Catholic and it went against everything he believes in.

Or doesn't believe in. Or does. Or doesn't. Or isn't sure about. Or might believe in, but might not.

SEE THE PROBLEM?

This dude can't make up his mind about a damn thing. LOL. I know it's not nice to laugh at people in torment but God can forgive me this once. Right God?

So that was the end of the Mambo King. Back in 2004, before I started dating Ex.

Now fast forward to last week. Guess who finds me on Facebook? And who got married in 2005 and is now living in DC and still in the Air Force? That's right. It's his royal highness, Mr. Hips himself, the Mambo King.

So my gut told me right away what it was that he wanted -- a renewal of the steamy conversation. He's so transparent. But I thought, well maybe he just wants to be friends. What's wrong with that? Nothing, Miss Bullshit 2008.

So on Saturday we're chatting, about politics, religion, and I'm like, you seem awfully lonely. Guess what? As predicted, the Mambo King's marriage is sucking ass, and not in a good way. There is a problem in the leaving-the-house-together department. There is a problem in the sex department. He doesn't say it right out, but it's pretty apparent, since he starts referring to that one 'intimate night together'. Oh lord. Someone's needs are not being met. Why else look outside the marriage?

And I'm not saying it's her fault. It's not. Takes two to tango, and you shouldn't be looking outside your marriage to get your needs met. You stay put and you deal. You don't wuss out and try to find another source.

"Well, I think about it sometimes too, but that was a long time ago and it's in the past now."

--- SILENCE. ---

The Mambo King is now apologizing for having bothered me. He had told me it had taken him two days to decide whether to contact me or not. That was a big clue. Skeeeeeeve.

And so it goes. Where once he was always online on Yahoo and visible to me, he no longer is. He has disappeared...whether that's because he decided he was on a bad path or because he realized he would have to find greener pastures in order to find someone to wuss out with, I don't know.

See what I mean about being different now? I am *not* going to help him wuss out. I'm not going to become some cybersex partner for this cheating confused fool who can't be honest with himself. Sorry, he lost out a long time ago and that's that. I have someone to be true to and I will not choose to fuck it up.

I feel really sorry for the Mambo King. He chose wrong. I warned him before he chose her that he was wrong but he didn't want to listen. He always complained about her health problems, that she didn't want to go dancing, etc. That she wasn't passionate or affectionate. And now look.

Honestly, it's a lesson for me too. I too need to listen to the red flags and not think I can settle for something less than what I need and want. Some things can be compromised on. Some things can't. Don't settle when it comes to the things you can't really compromise on.

eBay Goeth Well & How to Sell Stuff on eBay

Things are going well on eBay. I've only had like one or two items that didn't sell. I relisted one of them and someone is buying it.

One of the jackets I used to wear, that I originally paid $5.00 for, is now selling for about $11.00. Kewl. My black suit jacket will go for $3.99.

So, I have figured some things out about eBay, which I figure I will write about here. Why not? I haven't got anything else to do... the house is clean and D's asleep.

1. eBay buyers are looking for a good deal.
eBayers want to feel smart and they want to feel like they got a hell of a bargain. Their little egos get stoked by winning auctions, too. That commercial out there about eBay right now is entirely true. You know the one -- 'Don't shop. Win.'

Don't buy doormats that happen to be good doormats or imported doormats and sell them on eBay. No one on eBay buys doormats, even if they're from Pakistan. I could use a new one, though, so go ahead and bring that back from Florida, Mack. :) Love ya.

People on eBay are looking for stuff that is pricey when it's new. Like Edmonds-Allen shoes, or Tommy Hilfiger crap, or Kate Spade or Coach bags. Stuff like that. Not doormats. Stuff that they would normally pay through the nose for.

2. eBay buyers like niche stuff.
That's why my Martha Stewart books have allllll sold. And that's why I will shop thrift stores and Friends of the Library book sales for more Martha Stewart!

3. eBay buyers will buy replacement dishes.
But not all replacement dishes are made equal. Go to Goodwill and check out what brands they have a lot of. Now check eBay's completed listings to see if that sells. If you get a match, awesome!

4. eBay buyers will buy Harry Potter books but forget about Tom Clancy books.
Unless you have audio books, that is. Those sell.

5. Star Wars books sell too.
But remember the Golden Rule: eBay buyers want DEALS. They want to feel smart and validated about their decision to win an auction and thus avoid paying retail.

6. USE. PAYPAL.
If you're going to sell on eBay, use Paypal and while you're at it, upgrade to a Premier account so people who don't have PayPal can pay with debit and credit cards without signing up.

And, while you're at it, it would be a good idea to get PayPal's debit card once you have a balance, so you can purchase new inventory with funds directly from the business, thereby measuring whether you're succeeding or not and being wise or not.

7. Track expenses/income in Excel or something.
And don't forget about inventory. Keep track of what you're paying for inventory and what you're selling it for. Don't forget shipping, of course.

8. Plus size women's clothes that are in GOOD TASTE in the upper sizes sell well.
Like 22 and above. Remember, these women have a hard time finding clothes that don't look like they belong on their 60 year old Grandma.

And remember, don't try and sell your khaki shorts from last season. Sell your lined SUITS that no longer fit. Sell your $200 wool coat that you wore for all of ONE season that no longer fits. Make sure to replace the buttons first. ;) Not your old used t-shirts, unless they were pricey to start with and wash incredibly well and just look absolutely hot. :)

9. Make sure your photographs look awesome.
Good lighting, etc. Cropped appropriately and adjusted for color. I photographed my Martha books on a doily which was on top of a bright cheery green tablecloth. I did it during Saturday morning daylight. Pretty. :)

Another word for this is: PACKAGING. Format your ads nicely and tastefully. Show you have good taste and therefore can be trusted. People have more confidence in things that are thoughtfully packaged. Think about it. You know I'm right.

10. Kids clothes sell well, too if they were EXPENSIVE to begin with.
Right now I am eyeing some of D's princess dresses that I don't have much of an attachment to. Getting out of debt is more important than nostalgia.

11. Don't start the opening bid too high.
I started the opening bid on my black jacket at 3.99. I'm hoping someone else will bid on it other than the one schlep. But starting too high is worse than too low. You will get for the item what the market will bear. It's more expensive to relist than to sell it on the first try. You want to get rid of it and get SOMETHING for it, or nothing at all? Remember, think garage sale prices, not retail prices.

Right now eBay is a hobby. I am just selling things from around the house. But next Friday night, I will be going thrifting, systematically.

More on this topic later.

Raise Your Hand...If You Think That Ebay is Like Gambling

Selling stuff on eBay is a ton of fun. If people buy your shiznit, and if they don't leave negative marks and stuff. That would be annoying.

But let me tell you, it is so much fun to run a 7-day auction and to watch interest build as the expiration date gets nearer.

Some well meaning person who lives in a parallel universe gave me a $50.00 Borders gift card for Christmas. This guy is SUCH a nice guy, I love working for him. I am so grateful that he thought of me.

But, as the Mack says, UNfortunatelyyyyyyy, I have all the books and CDs that I could ever want and am in fact contemplating selling them on eBay. So I am selling the gift card on eBay.

Now this is the most expensive thing I've sold on eBay so far. Therefore, I have been watching it like a hawk.

No interest for like five days of the auction!!! WTF? Tension mounting, I changed the starting bid by $4 lower.

Watch some more.

Day six - a watcher!

Day six and a half - two watchers!

Six hours left -- five watchers!!!!

This can be addictive. I'm checking this stuff all the time now!

I'm serious, it's like gambling. I actually saw one gift card auction where the winning bidder outbid all the others -- and paid more than the value of the giftcard! See what I mean?

Sell crazy someplace else, we're all stacked up here.

Ok, the Mack is looking crazier the farther and longer I'm away from him.

I called him yesterday around 6pm, after not hearing from him all day and not calling him all day. Feeling happy and light, I go, "So, what'd you do today?"

"Do I need to report to you? Do I need to give you details every day?"

WTF?

"Ok, Mr. Attitude. I'll talk to you later."

He calls back ten minutes later. "I just wanted to call and explain to you why I said that before."

So I'm like, "Okay."

"Everytime I go out of town, someone calls me and I say Hello but no one answers. It's always from an unknown number [my work # shows up unknown]. So I think that you are trying to check on me."

What. The. F*ck. Ok, Mr. Special. I don't even remember what I said after that. I just felt really calm inside and mystified as to where he gets this stuff from. And I felt hurt, like, how can he think I'm that way? Cause that is crazy. And stupid.

I really should've hung up right then. Instead I found myself trying to prove my innocence or something. You know who this reminded me of at the time? Mr. Wrong.

I admit that I was suspicious when we first started dating. I had my reasons and it wasn't because I just wasn't giving him a chance or because Ex had cheated on me. The reasons were unique to this guy.

You know, honestly, do I need this much crazy in my life? And I can't help but admit that him not really wanting to come back from Florida because he has 'nothing to do here' bothers me. He should want to come back to see Dd and I, if he were really invested in the relationship. That's what my sponsor says, at least, and I have to agree with her.

Sponsor also says that we are disengaging a little bit because of the upcoming move. That both of us are sad about it. And trying to avoid getting ourselves too hurt by it. I don't know what to think. I guess time will tell the tale. I don't have to make a decision today.

Go Away Twiggy, No One Wants You Here

Dear Twiggy,

Thanks for not taking a lunch at all. Now I can't go either. I appreciate it!!!!!!

About as much as I appreciate constipation, or that nasty feeling when you go to poop after you haven't been taking much liquid in.

For future reference, would it be too much to ask you to take your lunch AWAY from your desk, since you annoy HRH, Me? Thanks.

So Complicated...

The Mack called me today from sunny Orlando where he is currently vacationing and searching for a new job from. And doing nothing.

He sounded really sad. Apparently, he has noticed since 9/11 that people don't like folks who seem like they might be middle eastern. He reasons that this must be why he seems to offend people everywhere he goes and why it seems like he's being picked on.

Don't you hate it when someone you love is feeding themselves a line of crap? A line of crap which you know makes them victims and thus incapable of hope, because they can't change other people, they can only change themselves?

I realized something tonight. The reason the Mack travels so much, moves around so much, is that he's running from things. He handles his business life well, he's very good at that and pretty inspiring, in fact, but he is always looking for something to fix him. When nothing ever works, he's outta there. He can't figure out why he can never find the solution or why his solutions don't work. And why his plans don't work. He's running on self will alone and the feelings he's trying to avoid that stem from some things that happened to him, which I will not disclose, are only going to get worse.

I'm no expert on this, but I've been there and it pretty much sucks. It's isolating. You can never just be one of the crowd. You're always trying to 'self-improve' but in all the wrong ways. Reading all the self-help books. Trying a new workout regimen. Listening to the quack that tells you that you need to eat a certain way for your blood type and buy supplements. All the things that never amount to anything except money spent and time wasted and a great amount of isolation. A good bout of crying would do people a whole lot more good than many of these self-help books and programs. I feel sad for him....he can't cry. Seriously, he is that shut down.

It's not complicated. The problem is usually you. Which is great. Because then there's hope. Cause you can change yourself. You can't change anything else. It's when we start over-complicating it that we don't get anything done. I even wonder why I'm taking his inventory. I wonder what I'm trying to avoid. I think I'm alright though.

We talked about it some tonight. I didn't out and out tell him that he's the architect of his problems, he is not really ready to hear that yet, but we did talk about that anti depressants aren't going to fix it, that adderall won't fix it, and that he's got to go to counselling. He said he's going to go. We'll see if he actually does.

I don't feel that this means a whole lot for our relationship. What I mean by that is that, yes, he's got problems. That doesn't mean we're going to break up. But these are the things that lead up to addictions. A lot of alcoholics, pill poppers, and drug users didn't start their addictions till later in life, when the pain got too bad to deal with anymore and they needed a fix. So, he's got to do something. I can't fix him either.

Ah, Gift Cards

So my peeps love to give gift cards for the holidays. They're such sweet folk.

Seriously. I'm not being sarcastic. Why must you paint me with that brush? Cynic.

Moving on!

This year I really cleaned up at Christmas. I should really thank OA for turning me into a sweet, dependable employee. :o)

In recent days, I received a gift card to Borders and one to a swanky new-urbanist development called Village Pointe. Yes, with an e. I told you it was swanky. So when I first got these gift cards, my first thought was something like this. "Oh great. Like I'm going to waste $50.00 at Borders! And what the f*ck can I buy at Village Pointe?"

So I decided to offer my Borders card on www.swapagift.com. The Village Pointe one, I realized, may have some real value, as they have a Bed Bath and Beyond there as well as a BEST BUY and a World Market. I got some stuff for the house today at World Market. That was nice.

And now I am wondering what I should buy at Best Buy.

But whilst I was at World Market, I was torn. There are so many cute things there! So many useful things! I almost bought some new clutter. But I was disciplined and only purchased consumables -- sponges, olive oil, and a calendar. And a tea dipper thingy for the Mack, since I'm tired of cleaning up after his d*mn tea thingies. He better be grateful.

I feel like my house has a ton of clutter in it. Everywhere. Books I never read, teapots that I just look at, pictures in frames that I don't hang on the wall because I suck at hanging pictures. I'll actually be a little sad when my Martha Stewart decorating book sells and I no longer have its picture-hanging tips to refer to. Bummer. I was thinking of selling those picture frames, actually. There's also CDs I don't listen to, a CD player that I don't use much because I store my MP3s on my computer. I'm thinking of thinning out that herd too, and selling them on eBay. And then there's all the books that I never even unpacked, and the yarn stash. So much clutter!

And now that the Mack has convinced me to move to a better apartment in a more child-friendly complex, I am REALLY taking a look at this stuff. Because it will all have to go with me if I move. And what's this I see in the NY Times today? http://www.nytimes.com/2008/01/01/health/01well.html?no_interstitial An article on how clutter f's up your health! I believe it!

I don't want to waste my gift cards. But I don't want more clutter. So what do I do with these stupid things? I can't buy clothes at Village Pointe; nothing will fit. I don't need to buy more books or music, that's for sure. So what is the right strategy to use with gift cards?

I want her to go to jail SO. BAD.

Britney Spears missed her FIFTH deposition appointment. I saw articles previous to this saying that if she misses another one, she might go to jail. God I hope so! That would be great. Maybe that would be rock bottom from her and she would start getting healthy. Jail can be a motivator, y'all.