Update

Well, things are going well.

 

Mack brought me a car from Texas and it’s pretty nice. I would say it’s just about as nice as my old car, but it’s got some hail damage. It looks a lot like my old Honda. Many of the same features are present. But the best part – it gets over 32mpg. Bingo!

 

We continue to move toward the altar. I have to go and get my measurements done so he can order me an outfit to get married in from Pakistan. He loves the idea of me dressing like a Pakistani bride at our wedding, and I’m down with that. Basically I will just wear a salwar kameez. That is an outfit that basically is a long shirt going down to the knees or calves with side slits. It has long sleeves and hopefully a lot of embroidery. J It comes with matching pants. I might do mendi as well. Sometimes though, I long for a white cotton eyelet dress and the little veil thingy. Maybe one that looks like a ‘New Look’ dress by Dior, tea length. Those are strangely slimming, even if the skirt is huge and voluminous. J I know I said I wanted a small wedding, but now I’m kinda changing my mind!!! We better get married before it gets worse.

 

So I say to him, when do you want to do this? And he’s like, ‘Next week.’ And I’m like, ummm, ‘Next week?’ He must be joking…Right?

 

Next up is the ring. We’re kinda on a budget right now so we may wait on that. It sucks but it’s reality.

 

Dee is doing great, I think. Her latest personality quirk is stealing here and there. Crayons, money, necklaces. We’re working on it. I’m not sure quite what to do, as the traditional stuff doesn’t work for Dee.

 

I’m still in OA and have a new sponsoree, she’s great.

 

And in other news, I’m considering converting to Islam. I haven’t learned all I need to know yet, but it fits better with my conception of my relationship with a higher power -  a direct connection, and no weird beliefs that I can’t relate to like in Catholicism. It’s simple.

 

It is constantly amazing to me, however, how men, and I don’t mean humankind, will twist a religion. There is no reference in the Qur’an to women being veiled or secluded. God only states that both men and women need to cover their bodies and don’t be immodest. Certainly I have no right to criticize women who wish to cover themselves to that extent, good for them, but I don’t plan to. Of course I would respect the dress codes in a mosque, as I am not so arrogant as to need to make my own rules all the time, but in my daily life…nope.

 

The whole idea that women can control the minds of men with how they dress is ludicrous. Men are responsible for their own thoughts. While we should dress appropriately, it’s not my fault if a man can’t control his mind. Honestly, this idea paints men as stupid and unable to control themselves if a woman is present with ¾ or ½ sleeves, or hair showing! God forbid! That’s just stupid.

 

Anyway, I’m still thinking about it (conversion, that is, not covering myself like a corpse ready for burial). Mack of course would like that but he says I should do it for me, not him. He will still love me and marry me.

 

It also never fails to surprise me how deeply ingrained people’s attitudes toward people from other cultures are. Here’s a clue that might help someone, should I ever de-privatize my blog. If you’re dating someone from a patriarchal society, and the tribal areas of that nation are still backward as h*ll and frequently reported on by the press while ignoring mainstream citizens, don’t *ever* complain about issues in your relationship. The first thing anyone will hearken to is how your partner’s not looking for an equal relationship, how they obviously are misogynistic…but he’s still a great guy, they will say. He just has ‘mixed up ideas’. And this is from very educated people.